Tuesday, November 3, 2009

The One Must Have....

Now that a brother is single, I guess I have been trying to figure out what exactly is it that I want. I was in a relationship for five years, and truthfully it will be kind of hard not to compare every new with my ex. Not that it’s right but I’m just sure that it will be a nature reaction. Now my ex was great, but there were certain qualities that I wished she had but didn’t. So on this day I am telling myself that my future “girlfriend” has to obtain these qualities.

1) A faith in God. I’m not some holy roller, but I do have faith and I want to be with someone I can pray with everyday. I want to attend church with the next GF, and have a conversation about the bible and God. She has to be willing to continue to grow in Christ with me.

2)Understanding- I need someone to understand that I may not always speak my mind when something is bothering me, but when I do decided to express myself…I don’t need someone to blow me off and act as if I shouldn’t have an opinion or act as if I don’t have feelings. I may not be the most talkative person in the world, so when I do talk about my feelings , at that point it should be important that you listen.

3) Confidence- My mother told me that every once in a while a woman is going to have those days when she doesn’t feel pretty, or those days when she may be lacking confidence. But my mother also told me It’s my job to insure her that she is still beautiful-Note taken mama… I want a woman that walks, talks, and looks confident. I want a woman who is sexy and knows just how sexy she really is…but not in an arrogant manner. But very lady like.

4) Take interest in my interests- My hobbies are simple because I am a very simple guy. My hobbies include working out daily, sports, bowling, and action movies. My next GF has to be able to do some of these activities with me, especially working out! I may not be the best eater in the world, but I do care about my fitness. And I would want my girl to be comfortable enough to work out with me. I am always willing to step outside my box and attempt to enjoy my significant other’s hobbies, and I would love for my woman to do the same in return.

5)Freak-Enough said! When you are with someone for a long period of time like 2 or years….at that point anything goes.

6)Humble- By no means do I want a submissive woman that would be so boring. But I want a woman that understand that sometimes its okay to humble yourself and follow your man’s lead. I would love a woman that knows how to cook, and clean. But that woman will also know that she will get the same in return. I am not like all men and my mother taught me well. I love to cook, I clean the house often, and I have no problem with being romantic-just as long as I can get the same from time to time. If you take care of your man-he will do the same for you! And vice versa.

7)Sense of Humor- For the most part I would say that I have somewhat of a dry personality. But I can be pretty silly at times, and I want someone that will understand my silly ways. I like to smile and when I am having a silly moment, I want someone that is going to be silly with me.

8)Supporter- Like most of us, I have dreams and I need to be with someone that is willing to support my dreams. No matter how big or small, she is going to be right there encouraging to keep my focus, and telling me to relax when I get a stressed. Support is very important in any relationship and it’s a must in mine.

9)Educated- No I am not saying that a woman has to be college educated (although that would be a plus) but I would like someone with at least a HS Diploma. My future significant other has to be able to hold a decent conversation outside of everyday gossip.

Am I being too picky….I don’t think so, I didn’t even say anything about physical appearance. At this point in my life that is really not important to me (although it does play a major role). I am looking for more than what appears on the outside, I’m looking for inner beauty. I refuse to settle and I although I could be wishfully thinking I will get everything on this list….it doesn’t hurt to try.


12kyle said...

I think you hit some great points. As long as you know that it may take you a minute to find her, you'll be ok. You may find her tomorrow. You never know. Just enjoy the ride, fam

Miss Mika said...

I don't think what you are looking for is asking for much at all. I am hopeful that you will find someone who posses those qualities.

Ask if she has an older brother with the same qualities and hook a sista up!

Just kidding...
sort of.

Anonymous said...

Your list looks pretty reasonable to me, homey. It can be difficult transitioning from a long term relationship into dating, so just make sure that you're honest and upfront with whomever you choose to kick it with. And try to be clear on what you want before you get involved with a new woman. Don't want to put new chicks on any emotional roller coasters.

Happy hunting! Despite what people say, being single CAN be fun, when you're making the most of it. So enjoy.

ShellyShell said...

i defintely don't think what you're looking for is asking too much! My list is very similar. I won't date a dude without a college degree not that the piece of paper makes you any smarter but I tried to date a dude without and it didn't go so well.
It may take you awhile but she'll come. For now just chill and do you. YOu were in a relationship for five years. YOu need some you time!

Cam said...

you're so right...one must have all of the above. Happy Birthday! I'm turning 23 soon and it seems like it's TOO soon. Thought i'd be 22 forever. sure enough forever was only 365 days.

Don said...

In no way are you being too picky. I don't see what's wrong with your wants and needs. From what I was told, there are women who claim the exact same. So it would be wise for any man to know what they want, need, and so forth.

I co-sign all your sentiments. Especially where you speak of needing that humbleness, freakiness, confidence, faith, understanding and support. Hell, EVERYTHING you wrote.

Good luck.

Mizrepresent said...

Great list, very honest and it really made me smile, because you are looking on the inside...instead of focusing on the outside.