Dreams of life being a utopia is indeed just a dream. One of the things that I am learning throughout this process I prefer to call “the growth period” is that life has many bumps and roads, and life is truly all what you make of it. As much as we like to predetermine special monumental moments of our lives, things don’t always go as planned because of outside distractions that arrive unannounced. Each and everyone of us were taught about making the “right” decision, and how those decisions effect us and those that are important in our lives, and now to me it’s all starting to make sense.
In my dream world, I was going to be married at 26-27, have my MBA and beginning to start a family with the love of my life. You know that whole White Pickett Fence dream really doesn’t exist. Although I have no regrets in life, there are some moments when I wish I could go back and right some wrongs. I realize that I put myself in horrible predicament and I ended up hurting the people that care about me the most. So at this point there is no other option but to continue to look ahead, and make sure I do it the right way the next time.
Someone very close to me asked me the other day if I was going through a stage of depression? I laughed at her and told her I was just going through life. I just pray for strength and power to control my emotions and not to result to things that are unhealthy for an outlet. I’m getting better one day at a time.